Coming Out…Again

After years of searching for a term or definition to describe my feelings, I popped onto trueselves.com. It was instantaneous. I had found a home.  I have been poking around for years, sometimes getting close, other times heading in the opposite direction.  I cam out to myself on 10.11.10. Couldn’t have picked a better day.  Still hadn’t told SO, and was still doing research, discarding some of the b.s.(think Jerry! Jerry!) and was solidifying how I felt.

It was during this time that I went to Outpatient rehab for drugs(hahahahaha) and bipolar disorder.  Psych put me on nortryptyline and within two days I was on the moon!!!!  But the point of this is that during rehab, there were group therapy sessions, as well as one-on-one with the Psych.  Also included is couples therapy. You see where this is going? no?

Therapist walks into the room and says, “So, Let’s talk about the trans thing”. That, mes amies, is how SO found out. I want to go back and cut out dude’s tongue and feet it to Sebastian! I mean, this is supposed to be a therapist, right? You don’t blurt shit like that out upon entering a room!!!!  What an ass.

It was an unfortunate and completely unfair way for things to happen, both to me and SO. And it took a lot of years to get back to a good spot. And here we go again. That’s the thing about teh trans. It never goes away. You can hide it, but if it’s in you, you are scarred (metaphorically) for life.

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