No, that is not a contradiction in terms. Nyctophilia is the love of the night or darkness. My preference, within the realm of the darkness, is early morning. 4am, 4am, oh Emilie! But yeah, 4am through 7am. Everything is peaceful. I can meditate. I can go for a walk. I can write. I can do anything in the world during this time. And I can do it in peace. Haha, this has nothing to do with SO; she could be sitting right here with me, and I would still feel that same peace. It is borne of darkness, but the darkness right before the light. What motherfucking symbolization right there, huh? Dark before the light. Being borne into the light. A child of BOTH dark and light, walking at once with la luna, and greeting Ra hours later. This truly is an awe-inspiring time. Beautiful wisps of thoughts, words structured just so float in and out of my thoughts; and they are powerful, evocative of deep woods and the mystery of the full moon.
And I’m calm. I’m centered, balanced. I know that I can handle the days challenges. I am connected. I have friends and family and I feel loved. That is all I need as I continue with these baby steps of bringing Sofia out from the darkest recesses and into this pre-light of the music of the night.
Let’s not forget the beginning of the night! Fireflies light up the night sky, and the air is thick with the scent of honeysuckle. Drivin’ n’ cryin’ on the brain. Let’s see who can pick that reference. But yeah, it is another time when anything is possible. The humming of the city traffic, people, dogs, cats, bats…all knowing that the night brings with it infinity possibilities. And it is only the beginning. Electricity crackles, and I allow myself to be absorbed by it. Mutually possessed, the night and I head in separate directions…for the time being.
I’m alive and I’ve got one match…