Yesterday’s post was a culmination of several days to a week of bad vibes, feelings, and such.
Today, I feel a little better. Still dysphoric, but pushing on. Hopefully, I can get over these horrendous feelings and back to regular old me. Transition was always going to be hard, as it is for anyone, and I think I will be amazed if I make it to full time living. With little money for surgeries, plus not knowing if I will have the balls(hehehe) to go through with them, I just won’t be confident in the workplace. I almost certainly will have to get another job, although my current job has great protections in place for trans people.
Just because those laws and protections are in place doesn’t mean I will actually be protected. And with the current political climate, I would almost certainly lose any court case.I just do know if I’m strong enough.
Fuck, I am just a big puddle of doubt right now.