Damn, dear readers of the page, trying to get disability is a big pain in the ass!! It has been a full year, and I am supposed to be on the fast track. Now, I find out by my disability that I have to go to see a state-approved therapist, because my fucking lovely therapist didn’t send in my paper work fast enough, and my psychiatrist did a shitty job filling out his paperwork. I am so pissed right now that the state sponsored therapist is going to deny me. I don’t think this is fair to me, because this therapist will only spend about 30 minutes with me, and that will determine if I am awarded disability. I have been working since the age of 16, and have had at least 50 jobs.
I am so pissed that I am shaking as I write this. I cannot believe that all of this is going to come down to one therapist, even though I have all my other doctors on board. I really need my therapist to call me back, and reassure me that she is on my side. I had a 4 month long depressive episode last year, for Satans sake! This is not normal. And even though I am not in an active episode right now, I know the patterns. Once I get a full time job, I’m good for about a month. Then my moods start to go to shit. My anxiety comes out. I start having to use the bathroom more. I can’t keep up with the commitments of the job, and then I am fired. MY last job, I lasted two months, then got sick with c-diff, which led to a 7 day hospital stay, and a 4 month depression after that. How the fuck can I work a full time job with a life like this. People just don’t know how hard it is to work in my life. I need a break, both for me and Egg, who works so hard for the both of us. I am still spitting mad so I’m gonna wrap this up now. Thanks for reading.